White coat. Heels.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
