Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
