a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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