watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
