You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
