butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
