if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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