yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
