Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
