What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I am available for nakedness
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
