its not stalking. its research.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Randomize
