I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
