is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Randomize
