wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
