I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize