I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Randomize
