We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
It was like getting head from an anaconda
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
His nipple licking is glorious
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