I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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