...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
