it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
drinking out of a sandbucket again
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Randomize
