Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Randomize
