No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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