I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
where does the pee come out of this thing
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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