what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Randomize
