Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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