I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
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