Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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