She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
