Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Randomize
