Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
