Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
