i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
