another moral hangover. fuck.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Randomize
