Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
