Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Randomize
