so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
