This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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