Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
