the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
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