At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
