I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize