Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i would punch a child for taco bell
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
