What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
