Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
