there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
