I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
