I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Alive.
So much puke
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
