Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
