His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
