apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
